What I am learning about Church Community
For the past year I have had the privilege to join a new(ish) church and a separate fellowship group. Both of these communities have become a central part of my life. While I have grown up in churches, and went to a fairly secluded Christian college, this is really the first time I have felt part of a Christ-centered community, doing life together.
Within this short time, I feel like I have already learned so much and still have much to learn, and I wanted to share some convictions I have had. It’s been easy to preach for years about how individualistic the western Church can be. The conviction for churches to become more vulnerable, inclusive, and community-centered has been strong for me.
But now I am actually in a church that highly values community, and it didn’t take long to realize how different it is to preach church community and actually live it out.
Before I go any further, I want to make clear this is just my experience and I am only speaking for myself. I know many Christians and former Christians have had very painful experiences in churches that were very close and vulnerable, and yet had toxic systems/leaders in place. Because of that, I can sympathize why many may be hesitant to embrace a close Christian community. Again, I am only speaking for myself and what I am learning, and I hope to be sensitive to those who have had very different experiences.
1. Church Community means embracing people you aren’t drawn to and learning to love them, serve them, and value them as equals
This one should be quite obvious, as it a central theme throughout the New Testament, especially the Gospels and Paul’s epistles. But again, knowing this and actually living it out is different.
For most of my life, I had the freedom to be selective on who I talk to, spend time with, and fellowship with in my church circles. I’ll hang out with this person, or that group, because they make me feel good. They have similar theology or political views as me. Getting along with them is easy!
But what about the members of the congregation who aren’t as easy to love and fellowship with? For a long time, my answer was to try my best not to judge them, not gossip, and keep a distance from them. I would never say this out loud of course, but deep down that was how I thought.
But that isn’t the community Christ calls us to.
There will always be people who we naturally feel more drawn to, and that isn’t a bad thing. But we are called to love all, be last, and serve all. (Mark 10:41-45) If we’re called to even love our enemies, what does that say about how we are to love the people in our congregation who are different from us?
Maybe our personalities clash, maybe they say/do little things that agitate us, or maybe they just aren’t someone you are drawn to spend time with. The Holy Spirit desires to do more than bring us to a state of tolerance for each other, He wishes to unite us as one Body!
There may be a time when you realize a church is in an unhealthy state, and there is a lack of acknowledgement and repentance. In cases like this, it may be time to leave that church and search elsewhere. But personally, I have also realized that I can be pretty pessimistic, and I often don’t realize what I have until it is gone. If I pick up and try to find another church every time someone disagrees with me, or somebody gets on my bad side, I will never find what I am looking for.
The truth is I am a mess, and by the grace of God my brothers and sisters patiently bear with me and love me anyways. I can and must do the same and seek to love those around me, and if there is any conflict to seek reconciliation immediately. (Matthew 5:21-26)
2. Church Community means serving people, not industries
When studying ministry in college, I heard a lot of anti-program rhetoric. Now being in vocational ministry, I am starting to understand why so many warn aspiring ministers about the over reliance on programs. Programs can be helpful tools, but they cannot be the foundation.
Similarly, I have seen many rightfully warn clergy not to see their church/ministry as an industry. I would heavily recommend Scott McKnight’s book, A Church called Tov on this subject. But for lay people too, I have found it is important to understand what it means to “serve your church”.
It is common to hear from sermons and small groups about how all members should do their part in serving the church, but what does that really mean? Serving can be a lot of things, but it should ultimately be about serving your brothers, sisters, and neighbors. It should not be about serving the industry of the church. This difference in mindset may seem tedious, but I believe it can significantly shape how we serve in our church communities.
3. Church Community means helping, sharing, and living with others
This goes hand in hand with the previous point. Tithing, in my opinion, is not enough, and neither is donating. Those things are good, and those of us who have the ability to should help fund our churches, ministries, and nonprofits.
But the kind of giving the Scriptures talk about are more than charity. James not only states that true religion helps orphans and widows, but also warns Christians to not just be nice to their underprivileged congregants, but to help provide for them. (James 1:27, 2:1-8)
Of the several passages instructing Christians to give to those in need, The Didache specifically instructs in chapter 4 to seek out the saints on a daily basis, finding comfort in each other, building each other up, and never rejecting those who are in need. (Didache 4.2-8) That sounds pretty similar to how the Church first formed after Pentecost:
“Now all the believers were together and held all things in common. They sold their possessions and property and distributed the proceeds to all, as any had need. Every day they devoted themselves to meeting together in the temple, and broke bread from house to house. They ate their food with joyful and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. Every day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved.”
Being in a church community that is vulnerable and close has challenged me to really think about what it means to love someone as myself. It has challenged me to rethink what it means to be last. My hope is that I continue to learn and grow together with my brothers and sisters in Christ. If you are in a church community, I hope the same for you, and if you are searching, I hope God leads to one.
Scripture quotations marked CSB have been taken from the Christian Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible® and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers.